Real.

Ask any autism parent and they will tell you:
when their kid gets fixated on a toy- that’s it.
You better have a back up.
You better not lose it.
You better be able to produce it out of thin air when needed.

In our household there are several standbys that are always handy-
Slinkys, Legos, phone cords, spinnings and books.
And now we can add a new one.
Jackson has decided he has a new favorite toy.  He pokes it, he prods it, he pats it, and he delights in it.  He throws Legos at it.  He laughs at it, and he cuddles with it.

The toy?
Me.

Jackson will request:
“Tina sit with you?”

And so I do.

He will bounce up and down.
He pull up his blanket so it covers us both.
Then?

Then the fun begins.
He will poke my eye and smile.
He will pull on my chin so I am face to face with him.
He will burp on purpose so that I will make a face.
He will pull on my braids and laugh and I make a face.
He will wrap his hand around my necklace and repeat “Tina necklace” over and over.
He will put his arm around my neck and smile broadly at me.
Sometimes we even sing together.

And on it goes– for as long as I will let it.
And how long will I let it?

For as long as Jackson needs it.
For as long as Jackson desires my presence.
For as long as Jackson.

Because THIS toy will not get lost.
THIS toy will not mysteriously disappear.
THIS toy is built to last.

THIS toy is real.

 

“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”

“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.

“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”
― Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit